Growing Up

I hated high school but I recently attended my 30th anniversary class reunion. I haven't been to any of the previous gatherings. Once I graduated I didn't keep in touch with anyone. I wanted out as fast as possible.

While flying back to Illinois, I kept asking myself why I choose to go to this event. I was second-guessing myself the entire way. The noise in my head was telling me that I had nothing in common with these people any more.

A few weeks earlier I submitted a write-up about myself to the organizers. On the day I left for the reunion, I got an email with all our biographies compiled. Most of my classmates were married with college age kids. Jeez, I suddenly felt old.

In my bio I completely came out. I came out not only as a gay man but also as a bodyworker and erotic coach. I was really wondering what my classmates were thinking about me now!

The reunion events started with a tour of the school. I hadn't been in that building for 30 years. I walked into the school lobby and instantly recognized some long forgotten but still familiar faces. (Yeah, this is my senior yearbook photo.) Everyone was really friendly and seemed genuinely happy to see each other.

It was amazing. Memories I hadn't been aware of for so long instantly came back. I remembered in which classrooms I had which teachers. I remembered where my freshman year locker was. The school really hasn't changed much in 30 years. The biggest changes were in the classrooms: each room had computers and the chalkboards were replaced with dry erase boards. Other than that, it was still the same.

But each of us sure changed. We all seemed to have left the pettiness of high school behind and became adults. What a relief! Throughout the weekend, I had wonderful opportunities to reconnect. Yeah, my classmates had read my bio and were actually interested in my life now. They asked about my partner and I shared with them about that important part of my life. They were genuinely curious about my work and asked lots of questions, which I was happy to answer!

It was nice to be with adults my age who shared a common experience. We were a good bunch of kids and became a great bunch of adults.

During one conversation, I did flash back on how much I hated high school. Right about then, the woman I was talking with told me how much she hated it too. Throughout the weekend, many classmates shared their own high school horror stories. And I thought I was the only one who had suffered! The real story was that many of us were in pain. We were all suffering alone, yet no one could say anything about how we felt at the time.

My experience at the reunion has gotten me wondering how much of our suffering is still being done alone. We've all changed since high school in many ways. But have we really changed the way we cope with anxiety? Are we still all suffering alone?

I've found that it's really helpful to have someone to talk with about anxieties. Especially lately. Find a friend or family member you can confide in. Share your fears and frustrations with someone close to you. Hire a coach! Many times just talking about our concerns provides insight to help us through the problems.

Orgasmic Yoga for Men - Accessing Erotic Trance

Saturday January 24 and Sunday January 25, 2009
At the Heartwalker Studio in Oakland, CA
9:00AM to 5:00PM both days
Includes 2 months access to the New School of Erotic Touch

Orgasmic Yoga combines the mindfulness and somatic expression of yoga with pleasurable, intimate and transformative practices that individuals, couples, or groups can do while sexually aroused. These practices always include mindful breathing, movement, touch and placement of attention. These practices can lead to a state of Erotic Trance.

Erotic trance is an altered state of consciousness. This is a space where the daily noise of our lives fades away and the sensations from your body come to the forefront.

For many of us when we hear the word 'trance' we think of trancing out. Trancing out is often through unconsciousness or drugs. Erotic trance is about 'tracing in'. It is about becoming so aware of your body that you can induce altered states without drugs. This state can have a profound impact in your life.

Common wounds, including guilt, shame and body image have been healed through Erotic Trance. Erotic Trance is a portal through which we can begin to link eros and spirit; this is a place where the focus on presence reduces our dependence on the ego.

This workshop will introduce men to Erotic Trance through the use breath, movement, meditation and touch – from others and from self. While experience with a yoga practice will be helpful, it is not required. Together we will create a safe space for some powerful and fun exploration (some exercises will be done with clothes off).

This workshop is a two day in person experience; in addition, the workshop includes structure to both prepare you for the experience as well as to help you continue your journey after the weekend. Preparation will done by individual homework and participation in an internet community. Registration includes two months of access to the entire video library from the New School of Erotic Touch; this is a $78 value! For these reasons, early registration is encouraged.

Go here for more information on this exciting event.

Special Discount!

I now have an online store!! You can register for this workshop at the online store. You can buy gift certificates for your friends here too. Over time, there will be more items available from the store.

I'm offering a special discount for newsletter readers! Register for this workshop online before December 1 and get 15% off the registration fee. Enter the coupon code 72cdd86a35 in the checkout page to claim your discount. Hurry, this offer expires on December 1!

Savor new experiences!

Ed

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